Charlie Pahlman Memorial


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The letters, emails, tributes and photos that are flowing in are so wonderfully healing for us to read. Many have asked to express their appreciation for these special words. Thank you, thank you, thank you.....

KirstyMagarey  AnetteBeckerLundell  

Most Recent FirstTributes 172
  Kirsty Magarey

March 20, 2019
ode to Charlie (well not really an ode)

So I just want to tell you of my sense of Charlie Ė and itís not a formal tribute (Bob & co have done that for me already) but a communication. I need to tell you about it.

In particular I wanted to comment that if anyone ever has given me a sense that there is an after life, in whatever form, it is Charlie. He is just So Not Gone. In a sense he just couldnít be. He was a life force in his own right. And Life Forces just donít go.

Whatís more I feel he is more than the sum of our memories, however vivid, because he was more vivid even than that, he was more alive, and more engaged with life than one could know. I mean thereís also the facts about him being good, and committed and loving and generous and so many things, but also, and above all, he was so alive. So engaged with life and living it to the full and enjoying it to the limit.

That enjoyment thing is what reminds me of one of my own particularly fond memories. It was a (F)ANTaR weekend at the coast a few years ago. I was heavily pregnant. There was a lot of swimming, and I mean A LOT, and Charlie and I both particularly loved the swimming and the body surfing. Hours and hours. And Charlie thought it was so funny having me swim with my Ďbumpí/belly and took great delight in my enjoyment.

And thatís the thing. He took great delight in my delight and in so doing he increased it and folded it back in on itself and through this process we were both just so much the happier. It was a knack he had. To notice others and appreciate with others and engage with others and to bring them out and get them to do the same. To have and to give delight.

Itís also why he was so capable of so many and so profound a number of relationships. Cos he noticed and appreciated. And the friendship thing was never impaired by the number Ė he had So many and Such loving relationships. So Many and So Deep. And yet was never too stretched but just encompassed them all.

ĎA great soulí. I love that line of Bobís. And itís a bit embarrassing because I donít really have or approve of heroes. But thereís no other word for it and when I would try and explain Charlie to people who didnít know him the only phrase for what I was doing was Ďsinging his praisesí. I would want to say and really explain how he was special:

He was the only person I thought was capable of handling political life and not being corrupted (and thatís saying something very special).

He was a phenomenon.
A life force and something else again.
He was the epitome of everything I thought a bloke should be.

∑ He could put my fractious two and a half year old to sleep in record time (an unprecedented skill).
∑ He could analyse an issue.
∑ He could make meetings endlessly fun just by being there and bringing out the best in others.
∑ He could (and did) lead. A natural/born leader without the oppressiveness that can be associated (In fact with a little more difficulty he was also a follower when needed).
∑ He could consult about those analysed issues. Take advice on those issues, develop plans on those issues and inspire others to help him carry them out.
∑ He could drink and talk forever.
∑ And lots of other things.
∑ And always, entirely, he could keep in mind the plan to change the world and make it more alive.

He was my hero.

And heís gone. And we are the sadder and poorer and more depleted. Ö But on the other hand heís not that gone. It is not logically possible.
  Anette Becker Lundell
March 20, 2019
We met during the years I lived with my family in Sydney. We had fun, you, your brother, my brother and I. I remember once, when you and Andrew were going to stay at our place and you both came with the bus. You had to bring some photos with you and they were not to be left or forgotten on the bus. I can't remember if it was you or your brother who had the envelope with the photos tied to your body! We all thought it was very funny, and practical.

I remember the energy and friendly atmosphere that always sourrounded you and was not surprised to find your name and pictures on the internet. The sites tell of the work you have done and still will be done in the future. You are a seed-sower. What you have started will grow and flourish for a long time in the future.

GŲsta, thank you for your friendship, memories and inspiration.

Shared Bottom Border

This will go to Andrew (Charlie's brother) and Anna-marie (tech support). 
Mailing address: 36 Upper Cliff Road, Northwood, 2066, NSW.